Caring and Well-Being by Galvin Kathleen;Todres Les;

Author:Galvin, Kathleen;Todres, Les;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Taylor & Francis Group
Published: 2013-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

Dwelling Suffering in the Temporal Dimension: Elusive Present

There is a suffering that emphasises a sense of temporal unsettledness. Here, for various reasons, a person may feel unable to ‘stand still’ either because the present moment is unpleasant or because the ‘pull’ of the past or the future has excessive obscuring power. One is unable to simply ‘be present’ then; there is either an excessive ‘running towards’ or a ‘running away’.

There are many variations of this kind of temporal suffering, particularly in these times when ‘tick tock time’ has become persecutory. But all these variations result in the core existential dilemma of ‘life passing oneself by’, stripping the present of its vividness, almost as if there was no good time to be there. Sometimes one can force oneself to inhabit the present moment by strong measures such as extreme sports or other absorbing pursuits. This reminds one of the kind of ‘well-being’ made possible when one is able to unambivalently inhabit the present moment.

An example of the suffering given by the ‘elusiveness of the present’ is where a person is so desperately fixed on a future dream that they are seldom able to relax and appreciate what is happening around them. In quieter moments they feel an anxious restlessness and need to quickly occupy themselves with some activity that distracts them from the feeling that this moment is never good enough. Here the future is too demanding and wields its manic power. Alternatively the possibility of welcoming the present may be excessively obscured by the traumatising power of the past. Here, a person may be constantly looking backwards to ‘ghosts and fears’ that possess the present. There is an anxious dread and the present can only be inhabited by a guarded vigilance. All of us can recognise various degrees of such everyday suffering but one can imagine levels of such suffering in which a lack of temporal dwelling visits and grips.

A carer or practitioner who is sensitive to the meaning of this kind of temporal suffering will look for opportunities in which they can help people to slow down and perhaps begin to feel the kind of permission required to immerse themselves in small and simple moments. Suffering as a sense of the ‘elusive present’ refers to any happening that cannot be inhabited and welcomed, and constitutes a range of suffering experience, from numbness to restlessness to ambivalence to extreme anguish.

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